My first surprise was that my RE didn't come in the room for the ultrasound. Instead the female doctor in the practice came in with the nurse. The backstory on this particular doctor is long, but basically on my beta day for IVF #1 she argued with me in the waiting room, threw miscarriage rates in my face, and violated HIPPA. I spoke to my normal RE and he made sure he was the only doctor I dealt with for the rest of my pregnancy and miscarriage. I haven't seen or talked to this female doctor at all since mid-February, so I braced myself for her awful bedside manner.
She was completely different. She came in, put her hands over mine and asked if I was ready to do this again. I told her yeah and that I just hoped it worked this time and she squeezed my hands and told me that she knows this is scary but that they're all there for me and hoping this is it for me. It seriously almost made me cry. They both asked how my vacation was and made small talk while doing the ultrasound. She started counting off my follicles (8 visible on the right, 10 visible on the left) and I asked about my lining, waiting for the, "I'm sorry, it's just too thick still." She smiled at me and said, "Nope, it's great. Everything is exactly where it needs to be!" I asked again to confirm I was actually starting stims today and she told me pending blood work, I was starting tonight, with ER scheduled for the 4th of July right now. I'm still kinda in shock that not only did my lining cooperate, but my bloodwork was great too. I only hope that these are all good signs for this cycle.
I was supposed to have my pre-conception counseling appointment with the maternal fetal medicine (MFM, for my MTHFR mutation) doctor at 1pm but I got a call around 8:30am asking me if I could come in immediately. Apparently there was a booking problem and the doctor wasn't going to be in in the afternoon.
The appointment was a lot of talking. Going over history, him reading my file and asking me for clarification here and there. He's ordering some more testing to just confirm my abnormal numbers, after which he'll adjust my folic acid intake (I'm at 4.2mg now, about 6x a normal person's dose) and possibly add in baby aspirin once I'm pregnant again and we see a heartbeat. He seemed rather hesitant about me taking Heparin due to the possible side effects, but wouldn't rule it out completely. I go back for a stim check with my RE on Friday and the MFM will have my test results either Friday or Monday so we can figure out where to go from there.
It's so nerve racking doing this again. The first time I was so on top of everything and this time it's like I'm in a fog. It's overwhelming at times that we're doing this again. I'm drinking my last Diet Pepsi and then it's all water and gatorade from now until after beta. I have to actually start organizing myself and all my meds so I take them at 8:30pm every night. I have to find a way to hide that I'm taking all of these meds from family and friends. That's probably the hardest part of all. Being so open last time and then being so heartbroken when we had to tell everyone that we lost the babies. Then this time telling no one. Trying to think of excuses so they don't ask too many questions. I can't wait to be 13 weeks pregnant so that I can finally tell everyone what we went through this time and show them this page.
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